More sunsets, ladders and hair vitamins

My father fell so many times and busted his head open that my husband told him, "Harold, no one can take a fall like you. As matter of fact you would have made a hell of a stunt man in the movies." My husband loved my father and they both had fun together.

Anyway at 89 my father also he also told me that he was not quite ready to go and he hoped to see some more sunsets etc.....

So that was two years ago. When I went into the 90 day silent retreat I really hoped nothing would happen to him while I was gone. He had a number of near death misses before primarily because he refused to believe he was old. He was a tough guy and fell off a ladder a few times and was knocked unconscious several times. We could not seem to keep him off of the ladder. We tried to take it away but no could have any control over anything concerning my father so we had to give it back. Even his neighbor tried and that did not work either. I don't know why. i can't remember the last time I needed to be on a ladder but he seemed to need one. Once he was helicoptered to the hospital after falling off of the ladder. He was cleaning his gutters. Since he had a do not resuscitate order they sent him to hospice. He had a subdoral hematoma and they figured he would not wake up. All of that happened quick and by the time I flew there he was awake and checking himself out. We had several of those near death incidents. So At 91 I figured he could go any minute but knowing him he could also live another 10 years. I had my fingers crossed nothing would happen while I was dropped out that long.

Fortunately when I got back from the retreat everything was status quo. I took him shopping and during our excursion he told me that he was now ready to go and that he had had enough. He said the 80's were fine but 91 was no fun and he did not have the energy he was used to having.He said even though he was probably not supposed to say it(??) he was ready. I told him that I was not sure how much what we thought or wanted actually affected when it was actually time to go. While at the store he wanted some hair vitamins and some teeth whitener so it did not seem to me he was that ready to go.